The Diva Book

A real life behind the scenes look at the life of the International Superstar Sangindiva...

Monday, March 27, 2006


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I would like to thank everyone who listened and left comments
about my music. I really appreciate all of the positive feed back :)
THAT'S why we're family!! I will try to upload more soon.

I'm still on the road but finally had a chance to update.

Most of these past shows have been privates-
meaning no tickets sold to the public.
(Except for the Jazz festival)

The first one was in Vegas. It was for the NFL.
The owners sponsored a "Reunion Week"
for the football players of the S.F.49'ers called
the 5 ring celebration.
It was to celebrate 5 years of Superbowl Ring wins
or something like that.
Now yall KNOW about me and my sports game!

There were plenty of football players but I didn't know
any of them- So I grabbed a couple to take a souvenir
photo with and kept it pushin'.

As a matter of fact-
I haven't been too savy with my picture taking this time.
My schedule is so hectic I just haven't been up to my normal
photo journalism :(

I DID take a few pics of the goodies that were in my room
from the NFL crew though :)
I stayed at the Paris-
(this was the view outside my room)

and I got a big basket n' stuff.
There was no way I could travel with a big basket
so I took what I wanted and left the rest for the

I kept the t-shirts, the engraved bottle of merlot,
the cocktail soaps-
and a beautiful crystal football and engraved stand.

I had a 5 am lobby call because...
The next place was Riviera Beach, Florida (jazz festival.)
Besides us (Jeffrey Osborne), Pebo Bryson, Floetry, Patti Labelle
and some other folks performed. It was so dang cold I was just DONE.
We didn't even go ON until 1 in the morning...
AND I had to be on a 7 am flight to Philly the next day!
Another 5 am lobby-can we just say DONE??!
Now I KNOW yall have heard all about Ms. Patti's performance.
I am not going to say much cuz she's my girl AND I used to sing
with her... but BELIEVE what ya heard and add 10 more on it.
'nuff said.

The next place was Philly.
It was a birthday party. This man had 2 birthday parties
on the same day for his mom who turned 80 and his
wife who turned 50. I guess he couldn't do one with out the other!
It was at the 4 seasons- VERY NICE!
For the mom's party he had Shirley Caesar perform. All of her friends
and church folk were there. Then at 8p.m. the room was totally transformed
for his wife's party and we (Jeffrey Osborne) performed.
Afterwards I preceded to get my martini on :)

Now I am back in Florida on my way to Trinidad,
where I plan to sun, fun, and get my rum... on! :)
Of course I'll do a show too! :) then after a few days
I will hit Sacramento, CA sing a song or two-
come home and sleep for 2 days before I'm at it again!

Aiight family-
I'll be back soon!


P.S. I did have more pictures but Blogger
as usual is trippin'! :(
This seems to be a habit *sigh*

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Blogger Fam... Lend Me Your Ears!!

O.k. yall here's the deal-

First I gotta thank SUPA , CHOC , BKLYN and ILL for asking for music.
Because of these wonderful bloggers I went searching around for some
type of program that would let me upload something for them (and YOU)
to hear. As a matter of fact... because of Supa's post yesterday I found this great site called
It's a site that allows you to make audio messages.
I signed up and contacted them about how to upload my music
and they said that capability wasn't accessible to the general public.

Now being the DIVA that I am-
I politely informed them that I was THE Sangin'Diva to which they
allowed me to be a beta tester for the program!!!

I was able to upload 2 tunes.
I tried for more but it started actin' all bootleg on me :(

Here is where you (my blogger family) come in...
I want your opinion... on any and everything.

These are DEMOS!!
I'm singing everything (even the backgrounds)
I wrote the words (except the anthem- duh!)
I'm artist and I'm sensitive about my shyt so-
PROMISE ME YOU'LL BE NICE!!! (but tell the truth)

The 1st one is my acapella version of the National Anthem...
(yes -I know the 2nd verse is missing- I meant to do that)

The 2nd one is a song I wrote called "Everything"

Aiight family
Get cha' listen on!



P.S. I'm on the road so you've got a few days
to speak your peace!!

Monday, March 20, 2006

Moody Mood...

I've been in such a mood lately...
A phone's been unplugged since last week,
ain't checkin' messages, not leaving the house,
barely washing my ass-

A somber, staring at the wall,
sitting in the middle of my bed,
sleeping all day, feeling sorry for myself-

A solitary, singleton, sentimental...

But kind words and
soothing sounds from
the 'men in my life'
bring me around :)

Donny said:
"I love you...
more than you'll ever know"

Luther said:
I was "So Amazing"

Prince told me how much I'm "Adored"

And Michael said:
"I'd always be the lady in his life"

That's why for me music is magic.
Every melody and harmony,
every diminished chord and scale,
every sound and every note- moves me...

It's such a release-
such a rush to be able to
open my mouth and have
the most beautiful sounds
come from ME...

To find perfection in my pitch
and cleverness in my runs,
sweetness in my soprano
and checks in my mail box
just to seal the deal...

Yeah... my moody mood is over.
I've got songs to sing.
I've got to figure out a way to post
a song or two for you to hear. and enjoy.

Yeah... my moody mood is over-
so excuse me,
while I take these shackles off my feet
to sing... and dance.


Sunday, March 19, 2006

Sunday's Somethings...

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So it's Sunday and I'm in FULL chill mode.
I am trying to decide if I want to go to the T.V. Land awards tonite.
It's going down in Santa Monica- which isn't THAT far...
It's being hosted by that drunk chic "Karen" from Will & Grace
(who I think is hilarious) but...
I'm thinking- do I really feel like getting dressed for it?
It's a fancy thing, it's gonna be cold, possibly rain...
I know these are LAME excuses for the reality that -
I just don't feel like going, I don't have a date ANNNND
I don't have a thing to wear!!!

It's official I have just talked myself out of it. Oh well.


It is 2 in the morning and I was bored...
(That's what I get for sleeping ALL DAY)
So I took a few quizzes.
I think it is amazing how much the answers were
really true to my personality :)

The one I REALLLLLY love is the last one-
According to the quiz I'm a TRUE Gemini...
which is... uh...TRUE!!! :)

Your Blogging Type is Confident and Insightful

You've got a ton of brain power, and you leverage it into brilliant blog.
Both creative and logical, you come up with amazing ideas and insights.
A total perfectionist, you find yourself revising and rewriting posts a lot of the time.
You blog for yourself - and you don't care how popular (or unpopular) your blog is!

Your Life Path Number is 3

Your purpose in life is to express your unique self.

You are a creative and artistic person with an interesting view on life.
Witty and outgoing, you enjoy sharing your crazy ideas with anyone who will listen.
A total social butterfly, you're the life of any party.

In love, you inspire and enchant your partner. You are often an object of fantasy and desire.

While you are very talented, you sometimes lack the ambition to put your talents in play.
And while your wit carries you a long way, you occasionally use it to mask your true feelings.
Your natural abilities can bring you all the success in the world ... if you let them

You Are a Cappuccino

You're fun, outgoing, and you love to try anything new.
However, you tend to have strong opinions on what you like.
You are a total girly girly at heart - and prefer your coffee with good conversation.
You're the type that seems complex to outsiders, but in reality, you are easy to please

You Are a Total Girlie Girl

You love looking good, and wooing men with your womanly ways.
You're so feminine, men are in awe of you ... which is a very good thing.

Your True Sign Is Gemini

Never Boring
Fun and Friendly
Eternally Youthful
The Life of the Party
Intellectual and Witty

Aiight Blogger Fam-



Friday, March 17, 2006


Happy St Patricks Day!

Animations provided by

It's Friday and St. Patricks Day-
so basically you've got free reign to

Have a great weekend :)

Visit The Doll Palace [Where Cartoon Dolls Live]

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Relationship Retrograde Review...

glitter graphics

...Living in a world of Ghetto life
everyone 'round seems so uptight but
nothing's wrong-it's all right- with my man...
(Giving Him) Something He Can Feel-

It seems lately many things have been going on in my life
that is causing me to put thangs (and folks) in perspective.

I was in yoga class last night and my teacher was talking about
how Mercury was in retrograde and when this heavenly
phenomenon happens it usually makes communication
harder and more difficult...

THEN I was going through my daily routine of reading all of my friends
blogs and my girl SUPA's post was hinting to the same madness with the moon!

The Supergeek -that I sometimes am- took that as a sign :) and so
I looked up some things on the subject of "Retrograde" here's what I found- said:

"Mercury, messenger of the Gods, is the Roman God of communication and everyday routine. Usually three times a year, for about three weeks, Mercury goes Retrograde, meaning that from the viewpoint of Earth, the planet appears to be moving backward..."

Hmmm...I had definitely been noticing how hard it has been to write,
communicate with and effectively get my point across to others.
Which is normally NEVER my issue.
I mean, the DIVA can sell you yo' momma even though she's already
yours- make you pay double and feel good about doing it...
I'm just sayin' :)

"...Not everything about Mercury Retrograde is gloom and doom.
Retrograde is a time to be introspective.
It is a good time to tie up loose ends, reconnect with people from the past,
make mechanical repairs and get systems in order.
This can also be a productive period for psychological and spiritual review
as new information can be gleaned from old experiences..."

Now I don't know about the whole "reconnect with people from the past"
bull... I think it's best to let sleeping dogs...SLEEP! But that's just me :)
What I CAN get with- is the idea of a "Spritual Review" so...
In true Gemini/Sangindiva fashion- I'm gonna do JUST THAT.

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I'll leave out gubment (governement) names and exposing details
as to protect the egos- I mean, the innocent- but I needs to do a

Review # 1. Mr. EX FACTOR

It could all be so simple
but you'd rather make it hard.
Loving you is like a battle
and we both end up with scars...
Lauryn Hill~

Everything's different...we're distant
It's a full moon and Mercury's in retrograde
maybe that's why we can't communicate...
Can you tell me what to wear?
'cause everyday your seasons change-
it's gettin' cold and I'm tired of standin' in the rain.
I think for the sake of my sanity-
we should let this roll and you should leave me be.
Visit The Doll Palace [Where Cartoon Dolls Live]

Review # 2 Mr. POPEYE

Though we stay in the same town
It feels like ya miles away
Though I saw you last night
It's like I hadn’t seen you for days
And every time that we speak
It’s like we don’t have nothing to say...

I'm over through,
I'm over like-
I'm over you.
It's official, I am hanging up my track shoes
because I refuse to chase and run behind yo' ass...
It's just not my style. And it's unattractive.
Like I've said many times before
we all make time for the things we
WANT to do and find important.
I never make someone a priority
who only considers me an option.


Review # 3 Mr. KARMA

Babygirl, I know I used to do
some ill shit to you-
Coming home late,
jumping in the shower
to wash off
the last chick's perfume
Changing my drawers,
stuff 'em down
to the bottom hamper
Taking numerous trips to Atlanta,
Miami, Tampa
(Girl, I was doin' my thing)...
Marques Houston~

What you don't understand is that
I can see it in your eyes.
Hear it in every message.
Feel it every time you take a breath.
Taste it in the air around you.
I know I'm the example of what
you want up on yo' team-
but these Dior bags and my time
gone cost GREEN...
No longer do I want to go
and meet cha' momma
Gimme dollars, Gimme Gucci,
Channel and Gimme Prada...
(Life's a BITCH and so's KARMA)
Visit The Doll Palace [Where Cartoon Dolls Live]

Review #4 Mr. AIDEN

"Down on my knees
whole heart in hand
I was accused of being too young
But I'm not so young
Can't you understand
That I think like a man "
Tower of Power~

It seems we never want the ones
who respect us,
treat us like we're special
and priceless...
And only asks in return
"for you to be yourself"
I guess anything is possible...
Nice guys don't always finish last :)

Visit The Doll Palace [Where Cartoon Dolls Live]


Wednesday, March 15, 2006


Visit The Doll Palace [Where Cartoon Dolls Live]

I had a hard time deciding what I was going to write about today.
Maybe I was letting the pressure of writing everyday get to me.
I feel like a journalist with a deadline. I don't see how people do it...

I decided this was my rest week because I'm about to go back on the road-
but this is also my "keep it real week" because reality is what we need.
At first I was going to be witty and funny- but my spirits are low
because I'm grieving.

I woke up to a text message saying a good friend of mine had died.
She died from a blood clot that traveled from her lung to her heart.

Now I know death is a reality and inevitable, but the death of my friend
took me completely by surprise and caught me off guard.
I mean, she wasn't rowdy. She wasn't a street runna'...
She had just graduated from college.
We were "Secret Santa's" to each other at Christmas,
we bought each other the same gift (and didn't know it),
we both screamed in happiness when we found out we got the same thing
('cause we both LOVE bath & body works).
WE were the two youngest in our online clique...
She would tease me about beating me out of the "baby" spot.
We were friends... we were SISTAZ...

In two days she would have been 25.

She leaves behind:
A 2 year old son-who will probably not remember her,
A mother who not only lost her only daughter- but also her best friend,
AND friends-like me- who loved and will miss her.

Her death really drove home the fact that tomorrow is not promised-
and that life is fragile, precious and NOT guaranteed.

TAKE TIME to do something that celebrates you seeing another day.
MAKE TIME to appreciate GOD for his ultimate gift- LIFE.
REALIZE how blessed you are... and be grateful.


Happy Birthday Baby Girl- R.I.P.


Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Tuesday's Thank You's and Thoughts

Visit The Doll Palace [Where Cartoon Dolls Live]

As I start this Tuesday post I would like to give my thank you's before I start my thoughts...

I have been bestowed a tremedous honor by D-Dot the King.
He has made me his Blogger of the Week!
Because of this great honor I will blog everyday.
I would like to properly and publicly thank him...
*Thank you, your highness* :)
He too, is a Gemini genius as well as a Dragon (like me)
so naturally he is wonderful and fabulous! Make sure you check him out.

I also would like to thank my big sister Kia...
The "Oh Well" *Sweetie* of Texas by way of the Crenshaw/Baldwin Hills
Mall and Slawson Swapmeet. (SOUTH CENTRAL HOLLA!!!)
She told me yesterday (and I quote):
"The next time you blog, you need to dedicate a whole page to me and how BIG sisterly I have been to you all these years since you were just a tike....and how if it wasn't for me in your life teaching you the ABC's of womanhood, you would be just a poor shallow image of a wisp of a person instead of the dedicated, hard working yet humble, INTERNATIONAL and saintly sangin diva you are today."

So to my big sister I say:

Thank you Sweetie Kia!
Now get your own blog- MISS BLACK AMERICA!!! WOO! WOO! WOO!


Now that I have gotten all that out of the way-
Let's bring on my thoughts... Shall We??

How do you know that you have stayed too long?

Is it when it's been 5, 7, or 10+ years and yall STILL aren't married?
or living together? or making any moves towards co-habitation?
or anything else of significance?

Is it when he/she still is on the fence about whether they want to
be with you or not- because they are still trying to see if "we are
gonna work out" in the long run? Although you've already put
in 5, 7 or 10+ years of BULL SH*T and casual sex?

When do you realize that you have stayed too long?

Is it when they promise they will change-
(and they do...)

the hour before they sweet talk your
clothes off...

during the moments of bliss...
glitter graphics

and the 5 mins after they get what they want?

How long does it take you to feel the *STING* of the

VIRTUAL BITCH SLAP you get when you've just STAYED TOO LONG?!

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Sunday, March 12, 2006

Keep It Real... You Get A Better Deal

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Normally I post pictures of things that have been going
on in my working life. But today I have decided to follow
my favorite motto:
Keep It Real- You Get A Better Deal.

The reason for this post is because I feel I need to show
another side of my job...
Most people think it is Parties, Premieres, Pictures, Exotic Trips,
Money, Sex etc... Now don't get me wrong-there is that and THEN SOME.
I could tell you stories of the things I've seen... and done,
but that is not what I'm talking about today.

Today I want to "keep it real" with you.

I am a Professional Singer. I don't waitress on the side. Never have.
I have been getting PAID for singing since I was 15 years old.
You can see my (government) name on many albums and major tours.
I (have and still) sing with some of the biggest well known names
in not just the American market, but the Hispanic and World music
industries as well. I make VERY good money and live my life off of
just one of my gifts. GOD is AMAZING for this- and I am SOO Grateful.
I am 6 feet tall ( with out my standard 3-4 inch heels). And a natural size 2.


Everyone has their own problems, demons and addictions.
This one just happens to be mine.

I had to keep it real today because I was in the Guess store
(buying a bikini for my upcoming spring break excursion)
and I overheard two girls talking. One was saying how she wished
she could just be anorexic for a few months to lose some weight.
If she only knew what she was saying.
If she only knew how horrible it is to feel this way- to BE this way.
How isolating, how sad, how lonely...
If she could only imagine being trapped in a body
that will NEVER be thin enough,
being trapped in an industry paints the illusion
of social "approval" for being thin,
or that being thin makes you happy and beautiful,
successful and powerful, desired and wanted-
but really it's an unrealistic lie.

I am considered lucky by my friends (who
are dancers, actresses, models and singers)
because I've never had to diet or take laxatives,
because at 9 months pregnant I was my largest size ever-
a size 6. Because with a body like a gymnast and a 35 inch
inseam- I could rule the runway or at least be a Victoria's
Secret model...

Well, that's if I didn't have this demon on my back
who whispers in my ear and tells me I'm fat and ugly...

I wonder why anyone would WANT to be this way.
I think that people don't realize that it's beyond a "diet"
and "losing weight." It's hell on earth.

So to the girl in the mall I say this:

I remember wishing to be anorexic.
It's an endless cycle. And the wish never gets answered because
when you actually are anorexic you don't feel anorexic-
(in the way you had fantasized.)
You don't feel like the beautiful girl you thought you'd be
if you just lost 10 more pounds.
And other things start to disappear besides your weight-
like your sense of humor and your ability to relax.
There is urgency, an unnatural anxiety that starts to take over.
It might happen slowly or it might reach up
and grab you completely by surprise.
But once it reaches you, it pulls you under.

Anorexia is a sweet talker.
It is a trap. It is quicksand.
It's a thief and a cheat. And it's a liar.
It's a bitch. It's a dream killer.
The thinner you get, the fatter you feel.

Take it from me- I know.

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Thursday, March 09, 2006

I'm Soo Happy I Could...Dance!!

My blog is back up and running!

I'm so happy about this! For the last 4 or 5 days whenever anyone tried
to access my blog all that appeared was a blank page :(

That was ALLL bad!

But now it's ALL GOOD AGAIN :)

Well, I really don't feel like writing right now-
I'm a little under the weather so I will post more later.



Friday, March 03, 2006

Hit The Ground Runnin'...

Hey Yall!

I am back from the land of the rising sun (Japan).
I thought I would get to come home, chill out and SLEEP-
but... a Superstar's work is NEVER done :)

I was waiting for my bags at the baggage claim from the 10 hour flight and
my phone rings with George Duke on the other line. It turns out Direct T.V.
and the new BET J (jazz) have come together and they were having a kick-off
celebration on Thurs. (March 2nd). Rehearsal was the on the next day
(March 1st) and it was 9 P.M. (Feb 28th)!!!
Needless to say I had to hit the ground runnin'!!

So let's bring on the photos... SHALL WE?!!? :)

I was honored to be apart of this celebration.
The line up was:
George Duke and Stanley Clark
Ms. Rachelle Ferrell
Kenny Lattimore and
Ms. Teena Marie

I love Stanley Clark!
He is soooo funny!
The first time I met him we were
in Den Hauge, Netherlands...
He was just as cool :)

Rachelle Ferrell is the most SANGIN' woman I know!!!
MAN!!! She's sooo fabulous with her little self :)
The first time we met was in Africa. If you ever get
the chance to see her live - DO IT!!!
She sang "With Every Breath I Take" AWESOME!

Lemme tell yall about Kenny Lattimore!!
When I say that man can SANG!! ooh wee!! he can sang!!
He was supposed to do a new song with his wife
Chante' (Moore) but she was sick :(
He sang a Donny Hathaway tune-
"More than you'll ever know" and brought the house down!!!
I mean wow!

And then there was Ms. Teena-
LADY TEE!! She is a baaaaad girl!
The first time we met was about 6 years
ago with her beautiful daughter Aaliyah
(who is a big girl now!!!)
She sang "Cassanova Brown"
yesss... SHE DID THAT!!!!

God is sooo AMAZING!
I have had the opportunity to work with some of the
GREATEST singers and musicians in the world.
Some of them you know-
and some you may not know by name or face-
but if you go to a concert, listen to movie scores or
sound tracks, read album credits etc...
you will hear their beautiful voices or maybe even
sing some of the songs they have written for your
favorite artists. In many cases the background singers
sound better than the main act on stage...
(but you ain't heard that from me!!!)

Here I am with Ms. Lynne Fiddmont and Mr. Lamont Vanhook

These folks gotz TALENT!!! :)
Not only do they get "ALL the gigs" (hahaha!)
They are two of the most funny,
professional, WONDERFUL people ever :)
I am so blessed to have met,
worked with and befriended them.
I LUV YALL!!! :*

A couple more green room pics...

Lynne, George Duke, Lamont and Me

Me. Rachelle and Stanley

After this show-
Lamont, Lynne and I went down to Santa Monica
to see our friends play at this club named Harvelles.
After a few phone calls- Some of the best singers
and musicians in L.A. was there hangin' and chillin'.
It was cool :)

Me, Lamont, Fred, Lisa and Lynn (lookin' sexy) :)
(Dana, who is partially covered is not a singer-she's Lisa's cousin)

Now let me tell you about our friends-
They are all accomplished singers and musicians who
have and still work with the biggest names in the industry.
A few of them got together- formed a band called "The Clique".
They are a wonderful band and I was glad to see them do
their thang :)

That pretty much sums things up!
I'm going to go hibernate now-
after my long leisure bath...


Wednesday, March 01, 2006

A-B-C'S OF ME....TAG!!!

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Accent - California (I like guess, like, that is like, like, what you'd call it.)
Bra size - Too small - I mean, uh...model size :)
Chore I hate - Cleaning up in general!
Dad's name - George
Essential make-up - Anything by M.A.C. especially moisturizer.
Favorite perfume - Lovely Sarah Jessica Parker (at the moment)
Gold or Silver? - Gold
Hometown - Oakland, Ca
Insomnia - Well if sleeping all day and not at night counts then yes.
Job Title - International Superstar...It's true
Kids - One Son- Aaron (He's the BEST EVER!!!)
Living Arrangement - ALONE!!!!
Mom's Birthplace - Oakland, Ca
Number of Sexual Partners - Yeah, like I'm gonna answer that.
Overnight Hospital Stays - June 9th 1998 when I gave birth to my son :)
Phobia - gettin' fat
Quote - Personality and Good Looks can open doors...But only Character and Talent will keep you in the room
Religion - Christian
Siblings - 1 brother, 3 sisters -all younger
Two I'm tagging - ILL and Supa Sista
Unnatural hair colors I've worn - orange... but it was cute :)
Vegetable I refuse to eat - BEETS! YUCK!
Worst habit - *sigh* Procrastinating...
X-rays I've had - Dental.
Yummy foods I make - SWEETS...yumm...
Zodiac sign - Gemini (May 29th to be exact so buy me sumpthin')

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